Cheating Boyfriend: She Dumped Her Cheating Boyfriend, But Was It Worth It?
So, I was dating this guy for over 5 years to the point where you could say we were practically married (albeit a long distance marriage). We met through mutual friends but at the time we lived in different states. How we made it work in those first few critical months, I can’t even tell you. I guess it was the wonder of those frequent flyer miles.
Anyway, at one point he lived in Los Angeles (where he’s from) and I lived in Atlanta (where I went to college) and he was very upset with me for choosing to go to college there instead of in Los Angeles to be closer to him at the time. At the time I was just a young woman chasing the dream of making the big time and getting my education was my top priority, not my man.
We argued about that for a while before we came to some sort of compromise: I’d spend a year or so in Atlanta and finish up in Los Angeles. Sound reasonable? It seemed so at the time. Also, we decided to take a minibreak from the bicoastal plane rides and just do our own thing for a year. I mean it wasn’t necessarily established that we’d see other people. It was just agreed we’d take a break from the back and forth.
So anyway, fast forward to a year later and I’m in Los Angeles and reunited with my man. Everything was all good until I found out that he had become a father to a little boy by an ex of his (and I didn’t learn this right away because he didn’t tell me right away). Needless to say, I wasn’t happy about it. But what could I do? The little boy was here now.
At the time, I felt like he cheated on me and of course I was pissed off at him. And of course he would rationalize it by saying “Baby, it wasn’t cheating. We weren’t together during that time”. I wasn’t trying to hear it then and as much as I loved this guy, I couldn’t get past the fact that he had a baby…with someone else. I mean, I wasn’t stupid to think he’d be celibate that whole year, I knew he was going to have sex with whoever, but I wasn’t expecting him to get a baby out of it. Neither was he apparently.
But anyway, we’re not together anymore even though at some point we tried to make it work. I just couldn’t accept the situation as it was. But now that I’m older and I look back on it, maybe some of this was my fault and maybe he was right, that it really wasn’t cheating if we weren’t together then (on then off). What do you think?